Today I came across this “confidential memo.” The subject read: Operation “Feminist Movement.”
Here’s an excerpt:
Can you believe the way things used to be? Remember when our fathers and grandfathers would drag themselves to mind-numbing jobs every day, having the sole responsibility for feeding, clothing, and housing their entire family?
And things were no easier before marriage, when man’s quest for sexual satisfaction was all too often hampered by the widespread moral code which taught women not to give out the “milk” for “free.”
Well, that state of affairs just wouldn’t do. So we men came together and did what we do best — formulate and implement a plan. First step, design the perfect world, the perfect male world. We decided such a world would consist of two things: less responsibility and more, no-strings – sex.
Brothers, have we succeeded.
I’m beginning to wonder a little bit if they have succeeded. I mean don’t get me wrong, I fully believe women should have equal rights, but I’m wondering if guys somehow managed to benefit from this new “situation” a little too much.
According to this NY Post article women are actually becoming less happy relative to men across all age, income, and marital levels. In our attempt to “have it all” we’re even less happy now than when we thought we didn’t have enough. So on top of everything else we did in the 50s (housework, cooking, raising children etc.) we’ve now added the pressures of a career and any other extra-curriculars to the pile. To quote the Post article, “What started as opportunities (for education, for work) have become expectations, which have only added to expectations extant 30 years ago (for home and family, for relationships).
Ladies! It’s too much! Men have even less to worry about now and can just kick back and call it Miller Time. Ok, ok. There are some quasi-exceptions. Some men do cook, and some are stay-at-home dads. But it’s still in a woman’s (F-ed up) nature to try to have it all and control it all, which leads us to more stress and therefore unhappiness. I mean I don’t even have a kid and I can’t imagine trying to add that to the mix of a full-time job, a husband who can’t feed or clothe himself, and all my other daily stresses of having to be an adult.
So how do we resolve this conundrum? Maybe it’ll work itself out over time – when all of us women finally snap and kill the men. Kidding. But maybe if we stop trying to live in a man’s world and start making it ours too, we’ll have a little more of a home court advantage. But for now we’ll just make our own Miller Time – brought to us FREE by the gentleman at the bar. Cheers.
{Photo reenactment: Not the actual shoes. I was dumb and forgot to photograph them.}
