In response to Anna’s Post:
Lets move here!
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Tags: Hawaii, new york, San Francisco, Snow, weather
After battling 80 thousand ants eating dog food in the kitchen, I left for work this morning. On my way I passed a 70 year old Mad Hatter (think more Tom Petty, than Johnny Depp) – complete w/ top hat, ascot and circle glasses. This was not a costume, but appeared to be this man’s everyday attire.
Not even a block later I walked by another man diving into a corner to projectile vomit. I heard and saw it all because he was 3 feet away from me. It really didn’t help either that I was nursing a hangover from our office party the night before and wanted to vomit myself. Blegh.
Tags: commute, Johnny Depp, mad hatter, sidewalk, tom petty, vomit
I went to a friend of a friend’s store opening the other night. The store sells cute vintage housewares and local artist gifts. I wanted to show my support so I bought a candle that I wouldn’t ordinarily buy. It was $28 – eek – but it smelled like Christmas and I couldn’t resist. It’s the Roland Pine candle from The Soap and Paper Factory. It smells just like a Christmas tree!
Here are my other favorite holiday candles I wish I could splurge on:
The Russian Fir tree is incredibly fragrant …When fir needles are rubbed together, the strong scent is reminiscent of bitter orange. This scent is a joyful and nostalgic celebration of the season and a must for everyone. (Also, just FYI, my favorite candle of all time is made my Pacifica called “Tahitian Gardenia.”)
White Fir - Crisp, fresh notes of Fraser Fir and Juniper
Orange Clove – Orange, Clove, and a hint of Nutmeg
Holiday – Vanilla, Cinnamon, Nutmeg and Gingerbread
I love PaddyWax’s packaging and fragrance names.
Winter Birds – Blue Spruce & Cranberry
Ice Skates – Fresh Pine & Clementine
Cocoa Mugs – Cocoa & Vanilla Bean
Gingerbread Houses – Fresh Pear & Ginger
Presents – Clove & Tangerine
Tags: candles, fir, Pacifica, Paddywax, seasonal, Soap and Paper Factory, Trapp
So today I went to Walgreens to buy a toothbrush. Two things:
First – they are locked up. Why? Is toothbrush theft a common problem that I am unaware of? Do they go for top dollar on the black market? Are they considered “Methamphetamine equipment”? What is it about them that is so dangerous that we need to have them locked up? I don’t understand. Someone please enlighten me please.
Second – since when do toothbrushes look like my tennis shoes? They’re all crazy colored with their rubber grippers everywhere. Do people really have that much trouble hanging onto their toothbrush that they need rubber gripper handles? How vigorously are they brushing?? Maybe it is like a mouth workout, hence the shoe resemblance. Hmmm, I may be onto something…
Tags: gripper handles, locked up, prison, Tennis Shoes, toothbrush, walgreens
So here’s the scene. I’m in the elevator heading down to the lobby of my apartment building, the doors open and in walk three guys. I’ll refer to them as “Banker”, “Best Friend” and “Drunk Bro Mike”. “Banker”, dressed in a very nice suit and sporting an extremely gellin’ hair style, looks mortified as he steps onto the elevator carrying a teeny tiny white fluff ball of a dog in a light pink sweater and bedazzled collar and leash set. This is clearly not his dog. “Best Friend,” dressed like he had just rolled out of bed, steps on the elevator eyeing the dog and “Banker” with a hint of disgust in his eye. And “Drunk Bro Mike,” who looks identical to “Best Friend” leading to my assumption that they were related, is a total waste case, wearing gym shorts, an undershirt with last night’s pizza stained on it, sandals, and smelling like Bourbon. It’s 9:00am and 42 degrees outside. I push myself to the far right corner of the elevator and begin eavesdropping.
Curtain rises. Scene begins.
Banker: “Dude, stop looking at me like that. She’s gotta pee.”
Best Friend: (Blankly stares at him).
Banker: “What? She can’t just pee all over the floor!”
Drunk Bro Mike: “Woah, wait? I didn’t pee on the floor!” (No one pays attention to him). “Wait, did I?” (Begins to recall last night’s apparent drunken festivities quietly to himself).
Best Friend: (Mockingly) “What’s with the pink sweater?”
Banker: “I dunno man, it’s cold outside? She told me to put it on her!!”
Best Friend: “It’s not that cold. Mike’s not wearing a sweater.”
Banker: “Mike’s piss-ass drunk.” (Both look to find Mike posted up in the adjacent corner to me, rocking out to some imaginary drum solo playing quietly in his head).
Drunk Bro Mike: (Quietly) “…..half way there….ooooohhh! Livin’ on a prayer”
**Side note: By this point I’m about to lose it. I didn’t know life could be this hysterical.**
Best Friend: “What’s the dog’s name?”
Banker: “Meezy.”
Best Friend: “Mizzy?”
Banker: “Meezy.”
Best Friend: “MIZZY?!”
Banker: “MEEZY!”
Best Friend: “Dude, what the hell is wrong with this girl of yours? What the hell kind of name is Mizzy?”
Drunk Bro Mike: (Still singing, a bit louder, to the tune of Bon Jovi’s Livin’ on a Prayer) “Meeeeeeeeeeeeezy! Meezy, Meezy, Meezy!”
And at this point, I was done and let a laugh escape. I couldn’t help it. The doors finally opened and “Banker” and “Best Friend” made their departure and I exited next. I turned around to take one last look at the scene only to find the elevator doors closing on “Drunk Bro Mike” leaving him posted up and rockin’ out in La La Land by himself. I’ll probably find him asleep on the elevator when I return home. I ran to work replaying the entire scene in my head in as much detail as possible so I could share it with you. It was too good not to post.
Best elevator ride ever. End Scene.
Tags: Bourbon, Dog clothes, elevator, Tiny Dogs, Yorkies
I don’t know what it is, maybe I walk too loud on the sidewalk, but almost every day there is at least one person that turns around to look at me behind them.
And whenever this happens, I have the urge to make this face:
If they weren’t paranoid yet, they are now!
Tags: growl, paranoia, scary face, sidewalk
I think it rained everywhere in the country today. I feel like everyone’s Facebook statuses included some varying degree of complaining about the rain. But not me! I love when it rains in the city. Why’s that? Oh you know why!
These babies!
Yes! The return of my Aubergine Hunter Rain Boots for those rainy fall days in NYC. Bring em on!
Tags: Hunter Boots, NYC, Rain
{Photo reenactment: Not the actual shoes. I was dumb and forgot to photograph them.}
Today I was walking down the sidewalk in my neighborhood and saw a pair of abandoned heels. They were black patent leather maryjanes. They looked almost new and were actually quite cute. My husband noticed me eying them hard so he said, “Well what size are they?” I picked one up and saw that it was a size 6. I’m a 7 so that really wasn’t going to work. He then asked me if they were expensive and I told him I didn’t think so based on the brand. However if those bad boys had been Louboutins I would’ve snatched them up and jammed my big-ass foot into them.
Then i got to wondering, okay, what if they were size 7′s. Would I have taken them? I mean they didn’t look gross. They looked newish. They were just tossed on the sidewalk with no one around. (Don’t even want to think of how they got there.) But I actually do think I would’ve taken them if they’d been my size. Free cute shoes? Call me shameless. I mean frankly it’s not that different than buying consignment shoes. I know some people are weirded out about that, but I’m not. I like deals. And I like shoes. Am I totally weird for admitting I’d take sidewalk shoes? Would you?
Tags: abandoned, Christian Louboutin, heels, louboutin, shoes
Last week I designed a chore sheet for me and Randy so that we can see how often who does what around the house. He has the designated blue pen and I have the red pen. We just started yesterday officially and so far the competition has been heated. Each chore completed is worth a dollar. At the end of the month we’re going to tally up our check marks and see how much money we’ve earned to treat ourselves.
You’ll notice the category “Jack poop” has 2 spaces. That’s because his usual potty routine is twice a day. Yep I went there.
Tags: chore, competition, list, wheel
